Dancing through lockdown - a personal perspective.

This last year has been an incredibly difficult year in so many ways for everyone. From March 2020 until now, our lives have been turned upside down with lockdown and government restrictions on our movements it has given us all time to stop and re evaluate our lives and what we should do with them.

As a primary teacher I was kept busy with planning and delivering online learning for my class and the connection with parents and pupils via Seesaw and subsequently Google Classroom helped me feel part of something. But there was definitely something missing ….

I soon realised that human beings are a social creature and I was so missing that social interaction.

Over the months of March - June I spent many hours outside, the weather was so lovely and got to know my neighbours so much better. There were many days where I was found out in the street chatting to my neighbours about the needs of my garden or the state of the shops! We helped each other out, messaging each other if we were popping to the shops to see if they needed anything and then doing the parcel drop off at their door step.

Down a black hole

There were days when I found it really hard to be motivated and I spent the day in my pjs binge watching Amazon Prime. It was during this time that I became so much more aware of my own mental health and that of others. I have always considered myself a strong person and had difficulties fully understanding those around me that were perhaps a little more fragile. At times I could feel myself falling down what felt like a massive black hole and found it difficult to pull myself out, this was something I had not experienced before and felt very vulnerable.

It made me realise how tangible mental illness is and think about those people out in the world that were already suffering with their mental health before lockdown happened. My heart breaks for them as I now have a better understanding of what they go through on a daily basis.

Planning and Delivering

The thing that really got me through was the planning and then delivering of our online dance lessons. We spent a few weeks taking stock of what we needed to do - there was so much learning for all of us - what platforms to use, what equipment did we need, what would be our timetable … would anyone turn up? This certainly kept me busy. When we had it all figured out, we set about delivering our classes… and people turned up.

The joy …

The joy of seeing pupils - from the youngest to the oldest taking part and genuinely looking excited was the highlight of my day. Even on the days when I felt like doing nothing, the timetable and the dependency of our pupils gave me that important kick up the backside to get my act together. Seeing the smiling faces and having a chat with pupils and parents just lifted me and by the end of the teaching day my heart was lifted and I felt I could go on to the next day.

Development and Learning

As lockdown continued, classes continued and I could see pupils developing and learning in their own environment, making the best of the spaces that they had. On good days we were outside dancing on the grass, when it was raining we were inside with the lights on. Our pets joined in, we managed to involve our parents, we started to organise workshops to help those performers that were currently facing a dire situation and we learnt so much. I loved taking part - especially with the choreographic workshops with Jessica from New York - it grounded me and gave me purpose. Dancing in my garden, creating movement whilst looking at the blue sky and hearing the birds song was truly inspirational.

Spirits Lifted

On the way we laughed - when our pets danced with us, our parents tried to dance with us and my spirit was lifted. The enthusiasm from parents helping and dancing with their children, the emails and comments boosted my mental image of myself and made me smile and cry tears of pride. I realised that this was something that I could do and in dancing with others, it would help me too.

Others struggled too

I started to arrange parent events this year as I knew that if I was struggling and I was on my own at home - I was guessing that parents at home trying to work and to home school would perhaps definitely benefit from some ‘me time’. We have had a Neals Yard workshop which was full of giggles and chat just sharing how we are feeling and a healthy habits workshop which led to Julia taking up live workouts for parents. What is the phrase? “ a problem shared is a problem halved.’ It really felt like this to me.

Silly games ..

Family events and slumber parties ensued. What a tonic to see children laughing and playing silly games with their parents and grandparents. These are moments that I will treasure for the rest of my life. …. and something that I will continue to organise for our Alloa Ballet Company family when things return to normal.

Belonging

Dancing has been an integral part of my life for so long and throughout 2020 and 2021, my sense of belonging and well being, was nurtured and lifted by dancing. I am so lucky to have it in my life.

Our dance family was just that - something that had come together in this terrible time and built everyone up. I am so super proud of our dance family.